Chaos, Crumbs, Contentment

I discovered something today. A light bulb moment, if you will. Here is what is was:

Serving other's fulfills a purpose in me that I didn't even know I had. And by living out that purpose, even in my imperfection, I find true joy and contentment.

Here is how I stumbled onto this life changing moment.

My good friend, Christine, came up with the brilliant idea of trading kids one day this past week while we had some date time with our husbands. After she watched our boys on Friday, it was my turn to take her two year old twins yesterday morning. So at 9am sharp, my home was filled with a one 1 year old, two 2 year olds, and 1 four year old. (Say that ten times fast!).

Laughter bounced off the walls, as did the occasional child. Shrieks pierced the room, as did the couch pillows and wayward Hot Wheels. Toy trains zoomed down tracks and miniature airplanes zoomed through the air. Four sets of little feet ran (not walked) on the hardwood floor, making tracks around the kitchen island, as well as memories. Snack time. Movie time. Twins go home time. Nap time. Ahhh...quiet.

But not for long, because here came Round Two. Cousin's Weston and Walker needed a place to camp out for a couple hours while Mom & Dad got a little time in at the shooting range in preparation for their up-coming hunting trip. The train engines were fired up, the blocks re-stacked only to be knocked over again and again, and sand piles were excavated by tractors and dump trucks as the four little boys did what they do best: explore and destruct and rebuild.

Two hours later, we said a goodbye to the cousins, only to say a hello to the twins again fifteen minutes later! This time, however, their parents stayed as our two families prepared and enjoyed a meal together. Laughter, conversation, food, beverage, and relationship filled our evening and it was good. It was comfortable. It was perfect.

Here is the best part about that meal...my house was a mess. Since I was watching children all day, I had only ten minutes to take a shower, which happened to be right before our friends arrived for dinner. (Read: Wet hair and no makeup the whole evening.) There wasn't much food in the house and no gourmet meal was planned. The table cloth had food on it from the night before, the ugly patio cushions had yet to be replaced, and the place settings didn't match. Oh, and for good measure, lets throw in there the multiple fits both of my boys displayed throughout the evening.

That's the best part, you ask? Yes, and here is why: Usually those kind of things would cause such anxiety in me that I would not be able to enjoy the evening. That anxiety would cause me to run around like a crazy women trying to make everything perfect and instead of focusing on the people in my home, I would be focusing on the silly details of my home itself, completely missing the relationships and memories God was putting right in front of me. However, that did not happen last night. Instead, as I looked at the footprints on the floor and the crumbs on the table, I felt content. Even as Benjamin screamed and kicked in a moment of frustration, I was filled with joy when I realized that I was okay with his imperfect behavior in front of our friends.

Today, as I reflected on where this peace came from, I can only conclude that it was because instead of spending a day focused on myself and my needs, I spent the day meeting the needs of four other parents. Small thing? Yes. But now I can't wait for the next opportunity to serve again. And then the next time. And then...